Seasons of Life
Do you remember when women used to be assured it was completely possible to "have it all" and to have it all at once? We were told by people who specialized in fantasy that we could have the demanding career, the little children, the husband, the hobbies, the travel and everything else we wanted without any sacrifice at all.
It didn’t take long for women to figure out this doesn't work. In a day that is twenty-four hours and a week that is seven days, we have a limited amount of time to do everything and while we might be able to squeeze in twenty different lives, we can’t possibly live them to the fullest. We can do some of the things we long to do at any given time, and over a lifetime, we might even manage to do all of them, but each life has seasons, and the challenge is to know what season we are in and how to live it successfully.
When my children were young, I embarked nervously on a writing career. I was scared to take that step from desk-drawer writer to published writer, but I finally gathered the courage and eventually began to sell some of my articles and stories. After a few years of sales, my family's needs became great and I felt impressed that the time about to come was my family’s time, not my own. It was a season for giving to others. I reluctantly put away my files of manuscripts making the rounds. I stopped doing genealogy, and gave up several other activities that had been important and meaningful to me. All the activities that had taken my time had been worthy, and at another time, would be considered obeying the commandments. This was not my time to partake of them, however.
The years that followed were challenging and I found myself occasionally rebelling against the inability to pursue my dreams of education and publication. I missed my ancestors. I longed to take care of myself. And yet, in quieter moments, I was proud of the work I was accomplishing within my home, and within the church callings I was given. It was a time to learn unselfishness and service, and that, in its own way, was as fulfilling as the other work I had given up. I continued to write an online column to keep my skills sharp, but I knew I did not have the emotional energy left for the stress of freelancing. Looking back over a season that lasted about seven years, I can see God’s hand in the Plan, and I know that what I learned as I put my family first strengthened me and helped me to learn more about myself.
Recently, while praying, I felt prompted that it was almost my time again, a time when I could be a little selfish and return to the pursuits I love. My children are older, my family life calmer, and there is time and energy for what is ahead. As the time for me grew near, Heavenly Father began to place in my path new opportunities, new friends to guide me through a new time, a book contract, and a new home right where my ancestors once lived so I could visit their graves, their homes, and their world.
It is so hard when the season in which you find yourself is one that does not come easily to you. Over the past years, as I’ve spent changing seasons not just waiting, but learning and growing, I have realized that every season is valuable. Even if I cannot see the beauty of a storm, the beauty is there and some day, when the picture is clear, I will also know the blessings of the rainbow that follows. When we allow ourselves to focus on those parts of mortal life that God chooses for us, we experience a joy and a growth that could not be possible if we tried to have it all, every day, in our own way.
Treasure each season.