Teaching Children to be Good Tourists
During a recent sight-seeing trip, the tour guide had to ask a parent to take her child from the room because he was yelling, making it difficult for the guide to be heard. Even young children can learn to behave appropriately in sight-seeing situations if the parents spend time training and use good judgment in deciding where to take children.
Many parents presume it's acceptable for their child to run around, make noise, and generally disrupt others because he's too little to know better. The child's behavior is the parent's responsibility, and it's up to the parents to be sure others don't have their tourist experience spoiled by a child who isn't ready to be in that situation.
Leave your children at home if you plan to go someplace where it's important for your child to be quiet, such as a guided tour, a play, or an art museum. Find out if they can handle these situations by testing them in other areas. A child who can't sit quietly at church is likely to be unable to sit quietly while you attend a lecture. Since children are welcome at church, and not at lectures, you should practice improving their behavior there.
The first step is to teach a child how he's expected to behave in certain situations. He can learn to sit quietly at church even as a toddler if you gradually increase the amount of time he's expected to do so. Concentrate first on teaching him to sit quietly—without toys—until the Sacrament is passed. Then try to make it to the first talk. Allow him, once the Sacrament is passed, to have a book or doll, but nothing that is noisy or requires him to wiggle around through the first talk. During the second talk, give him something slightly more active, such as an individual flannel board with a scripture story. When he's handling the first talk well, return to allowing no more than a quiet toy. Avoid food, since many tourism places don't allow food. If your child isn't being quiet, take him out and place him in an empty classroom. Expect him to sit quietly in his own chair until he's bored and then return him to a more interesting room—the chapel.
Another important step to becoming a good tourist is to learn to walk and stand quietly. Practice walking down halls and streets quietly. Choose a name for this type of walking, such as Grown-up Walking. When you tell your child it's time for grown-up walking, he will know he can't run, and must stay at your side at all times.
Teach him about indoor voices. Explain that sometimes we even have to use indoor voices when we're outside, so if you ask for indoor voices, he must obey, even if he is outside. Practice by sometimes calling out "Indoor Voices" and setting a timer. The child can't speak louder than a very soft voice until the timer goes off.
Teach your child not to touch anything without permission. The grocery store is a great place to practice this skill. Again, develop a code name for this behavior so you can remind him quickly when needed.
Once you feel your child's behavior is under control, test it in situations that aren't critical. Before leaving home, go over the expected behavior. Remind your child again just before entering. Keep him with you at all times, and don't get so interested in what you're seeing that you forget to monitor his behavior. If he isn't behaving and doesn't respond to a reminder, take him out immediately. You should plan to keep your visits very short at first, and try to leave before he becomes restless. Gradually increase the amount of time you stay in these situations. This means you need to choose places you are willing to leave, so don't choose high priced museums.
When my children were young, they wanted to attend an art museum. This is a place where children are seldom wanted. I told them most people feel children can't behave in art museums. They were offended, and insisted they could. We discussed appropriate behavior and then I told them many people who go to art museums take sketch pads and draw the paintings they like. They each received a new sketch pad and pencil. Being able to draw kept them entertained. Happily, several people stopped to praise their behavior, which reinforced their enjoyment at knowing how to behave appropriately.
Children won't behave perfectly every time, but if they're trained consistently and lovingly, they will soon be model tourists, welcome anywhere they go. Children have a right to be welcome, so parents have a responsibility to teach them how to make that happen.