Visiting Teaching
A woman once had two visiting teachers who came the first Wednesday of each month. They were always on time and always brought cookies. They entered, gave the lesson and then said, “We had just been talking about….” Immediately, they returned to the conversation they had been holding on their way to her house. For the next ten minutes, they completely ignored the sister they were visiting as they chattered happily between themselves. When the allotted fifteen-minute visit was over, they stood up and asked, “Is there anything we can do for you?” The sister always smiled and said no, to which they cheerfully recited, “Well, call on us at any time. You know we love you.” Then they went back to their conversation as they left the home and went on to their next tightly scheduled appointment. The sister they visited was active and had a sense of humor, so she found these duty calls amusing, but she never asked them for help. She knew they didn’t really love her, because if they did, they wouldn’t have ignored her. She hoped they weren’t assigned any women who were inactive or struggling, and who might be hurt.
On the other hand, I once had visiting teachers assigned to me just after I moved to a new ward. On their first visit, they placed their names and phone numbers on my refrigerator with a handwritten plea that I please call. They stayed as long as they felt they should stay to make the visit perfect. The day before Thanksgiving, when they knew I’d be homesick, they stopped by with little gifts so I’d know I was loved. One day I needed some help, but I was still new and didn’t really know anyone. I was too shy to call the Relief Society for help. Then my eyes fell on the card my visiting teachers had placed in my kitchen, and I remembered their pleas that I call. I called one of them and she not only agreed to help out, but was so excited, repeatedly thanking me for choosing her, that I almost felt I had done her a favor. My other visiting teacher, upon learning that I had called her companion, made me promise that she got to do the next service. When they said they loved me, I believed them.
A good home or visiting teacher will do all the technical things the first pair of sisters did. Technically, they had the job down to perfection: they came on a set day so the sister knew when to expect them. They brought gifts, prepared and taught a lesson and stayed fifteen minutes. And yet, they were not doing their job because we are never asked to do our job. We are asked to magnify our callings. The second pair of sisters magnified their callings and as a result, they helped a lonely sister learn to fit in and feel cared for even though her family was far away.
Teaching takes many forms. While home and visiting teachers do offer a brief lesson, the most important lesson they teach is not the one that came from the lesson book. The most important lessons come from the love they bring with them each month, and each time they contact those they visit throughout the month. A home or visiting teacher can become a trusted resource, someone who visits because they love the person they are assigned to. They become the first people the families turn to in a time of crisis. These times of magnifying our callings become little lessons in love, trust and service. The home and visiting teachers model for their families the love of Christ. He cannot come to visit each month, so he sends a few people into that home to find out what the family’s needs are, and to arrange for those needs to be met. He sends them to bring His love through their own. The home and visiting teacher are a key factor in the cultivation of kindness, love and acceptance within the ward family.
By Terrie Lynn Bittner