Preparing a Personal Story for Telling
A carefully chosen story from your own life can have far more power than one made up for the lesson. Many teachers find it helpful to start a file of stories they can tell in classes, and noting the lessons they might illustrate. Most events can teach several principles depending on how they are told. For instance, I have a favorite story from my first Primary class that I have used in talks about teaching, children, blessings, prayer and love.
Use wisdom and prayer when you choose stories to tell. First, be sure the story is yours to tell. If it happened to someone else, obtain permission unless the story has been publicly told. You should never tell a story that will embarrass someone or reveal their secrets. If you are telling a story that occurred in another ward, remove any identifying information. My own policy is to never tell stories that happened in the ward where I am currently living. Since I move a great deal, the stories are not identifiable. Even then, I change names and leave out certain details. My stories are also positive about others-I’m the one who makes mistakes in my stories.
Never tell stories about serious transgressions or stories that will make it hard for others to respect you. Use the guidelines found in Teaching No Greater Call and the church handbook of instructions, as well as those given by your own leaders. In addition, we are instructed to avoid sensationalism or striving for an emotional reaction. In other words, tell the story to truly illustrate your lesson and tell it sincerely and without theatrics.
There is always a temptation to tell any true story in great detail. When you are preparing the story, write it out as it comes to you. Then delete any material that is not important to the story. The important details are those needed to make your point, or to make the story clear. Take a look at the following fictional story:
“When I was ten years old, I was living in Ohio-or maybe it was Washington then. I can’t remember. No, it must have been Ohio, because we had the black dog then. I had to share a room with my brother, who was younger than me and a real nuisance. Anyway, that year I had a new teacher. Mr. Black? I can’t remember. So Mr. Black, or whoever he was didn’t like Mormons, and that meant he didn’t like me. One day he decided that since we were learning about Japan, we would have a real tea party. He brought in this tea and I asked if it had caffeine in it. My fried Bob started laughing and said I was an idiot and who cared anyway. The teacher said it did have caffeine, but that one cup wouldn’t kill me. He told me I had to drink it because it was part of the lesson. I told him I couldn’t because I was a Latter-day Saint and we don’t drink tea. He said if I didn’t I’d fail the class. Boy was I scared. I was a pretty new kid and I didn’t want the other kids to think I was a goody-two-shoes or something, and I didn’t want to fail either. I didn’t know what to do. The teacher put the tea in front of me on my desk and then stood there waiting to see what I’d do. I wanted to be anywhere else by then. I was really glad when two of the other kids started fighting and the teacher got distracted. Toby was a lot bigger than the kid he was fighting so it took a pretty long time for the teacher to get back to me. Then he came back and stood over my desk and waited to find out what I'd do. After thinking it over quickly, I told him I wouldn’t drink it even if it meant I’d fail. He looked at me for a moment, and then took back the tea and smiled. He said he was surprised at my nerve, but maybe the Mormons weren’t so bad after all if they taught their kids to stand up for their beliefs.”
There is a lot in that story that does not need to be there. The boy’s age is important, but where he lived was not. Take it out, and if it slips in, don’t debate with yourself over the details. No one will really care where you lived when you were ten. Now go through the story and take out everything you would leave out if you were telling the story. Is there anything you would add? Compare your version to mine. (This is not to suggest that my version is the best one. It is simply how I would tell the story as efficiently as possible.)
“When I was ten years old, I had a new teacher. Mr. Black didn’t like Mormons, and that meant he didn’t like me. One day he decided that since we were learning about Japan, we would have a real tea party. He brought in tea and I asked if it had caffeine in it. The teacher said it did have caffeine, but that one cup wouldn’t kill me. He told me I had to drink it because it was part of the lesson. I told him I couldn’t because I was a Latter-day Saint and we don’t drink tea. He said if I didn’t I’d fail the class. Boy, was I scared! I was a pretty new kid and I didn’t want the other kids to think I was a goody-two-shoes or something, and I didn’t want to fail either. I didn’t know what to do. The teacher put the tea in front of me on my desk and then stood there waiting to see what I’d do. After thinking it over quickly, I told him I wouldn’t drink it even if it meant I’d fail. He looked at me for a moment, and then took back the tea and smiled. He said he was surprised at my nerve, but maybe the Mormons weren’t so bad after all if they taught their kids to stand up for their beliefs.”
You can see that I removed any fact that didn’t relate to the story. Although the man wasn’t sure what the teacher’s name was, it doesn’t really matter, so I used Mr. Black. I never use real names anyway when I tell a story. I did leave in information about the boy’s feelings, since that can make the story more real to your students, especially if they are children. The fact about the best friend making fun of him might have been left in. I’d consider it optional based on the students you are teaching.
